Me Have Questions

From: Lulu Blue
To: Contributions@explorehuckabee.com
Date: Feb 2, 2008 7:48 PM
Subject: Contributions from Little Rock Native

Mr. Huckabee:

I’m writing on behalf of my grandmother, Eleanor Elizabeth Blue. She’s a 90-year-old former adult entertainer now living in Little Rock and she wants to donate to your presidential campaign! In addition to a small monetary contribution ($2,500), Gramma B wants to donate her old stage costumes to your effort. Everything is in impeccable condition and should be worth a pretty penny on eBay.

Would you be interested in the ostrich feather fans, vintage pasties and one-of-a-kind silk G-strings (carefully laundered, of course) that my grandmother used on the burlesque circuit? I think they’re quite valuable and the proceeds could be added to Gramma B’s initial $2,500 contribution to your campaign.

I truly hope you will accept my grandmother’s generous offer, Mr. Huckabee. I’ll look forward to hearing from you or one of your associates soon to get the ball rolling! Gramma B calls nearly every 15 minutes with the latest news on your campaign and it would make her very, very happy to hear that you will be able to use both her personal check for $2,500 and the cherished mementoes from her past to further your efforts.

With best regards,
Lulu Blue

P.S. Gramma B is also a HUGE Chuck Norris fan! Please tell Chuck that she uses her Total Gym three days a week.